95 Thoughts I Had While Watching ‘The Housemaid’

Today—the day I saw the new psychological thriller The Housemaid at AMC Kips Bay, which, for my money, is the best theater in New York—marks a special moment in history. I have not seen a scary, spooky, or even mildly unsettling movie in theaters since a showing of Jeepers Creepers that my cousins snuck me into at age eight caused me to sleep in my mom’s bed for a year.

Granted, this film—led by Amanda Seyfried and Sydney Sweeney, and based on a bestselling novel by Frieda McFadden—isn’t quite on the slasher-flick level of horror and gore, but still… I was afraid!

Let’s dive in and track quite literally every thought I had during The Housemaid, shall we? (Warning: major spoilers ahead!)